Example of the Elementary School Composition Process

Feedback Requested:

Do you think the title fits the song? Should I add a harmony part? Should I add a different instrument? Thanks for your feedback.

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Amy's Original Composition

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Hi Amy,

What a lovely piece you have here. Good work. By using the 5/4 you have created the unsettled nature of a restless wind and then in m.6,7,and 11,12 there is a settled feeling for a little as if the wind has stopped briefly. Very, very nice. One suggestion I have is that in measures 8 & 9 and 13 & 14 it is almost too much "calm". I have a feeling that you might want to try changing those measures just a little to add to the feeling of restlessness.

I think the solo recorder is wonderful by itself. It is a very lonely and mysterious sound. "Whistling" implies fast and I guess I feel that your piece doesn't make the wind feel fast as much a restless so perhaps "Restless Wind" might fit the piece better. If you wanted to continue, however, you could make a B section with a lot of 8th and 16th notes and that would give you the "whistling" effect.

Amy, great work. I look forward to hearing more. Good luck.

Carolyn, Mentor

Dear Carolyn,

Thanks for your feedback! I will try some of your suggestions and see how it works out!

Amy

Dear Amy,

We are a composition class of 4th and 5th graders at John F. Kennedy in Winooski. This is the first time writing music for most of us. Our teacher had us listen to your composition to critique it to help us in writing our own music.

First off, we think your title fits your piece very well. However, we thought the tempo was too slow. We tried the tempo at 140 and liked it. That is when it sounded like whistling wind.

We thought the melody repeated too much and thought perhaps a second voice (harmony) would make it more interesting. (We would not change the melody because we figured it was written for beginning recorder players and the repeats would help them to play it better.) We also thought a bass recorder for the second voice would sound good.

Thanks for sharing your composition with us. We look forward to hearing what you do next with your composition.

John F. Kennedy, 4th/5th grade composition class

Hi, my name is Toni. I'm in grade 4. I like your piece. I think that your title fits it, because it sounds like the wind. I liked the melody, and how it went up and down like the wind blowing the trees. Did you try hearing it with any other instruments? You did a good job on this.

Toni, 4th grade student

Dear Toni,

Thanks for your feedback. I am thinking about putting in a second instrument but I'm not sure what it will be yet. I haven't tried hearing it with any other instruments but I will soon.

Amy

I took some of the advice I got and I wrote a second part. I stayed after school one day, I was just putting down notes that sounded good. I had my music teacher check it and she said that some of the notes didn't work well, so I changed them and now it sounds really, really good.

Feedback Requested:

Should I add a 3rd part and another instrument, and change the title completely?

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First Revision of Composition

Hi Amy,

I enjoyed listening to your piece, Amy. It's exciting hearing a composition with a rhythm in five, and you've created a musical and interesting piece. A third voice could be wonderful; I suggest you try it out and decide if you would rather have two or three voices. One of the beauties of composition is experimenting with ideas and then choosing what best speaks to you.

Keep up the good work, and I'm looking forward to hearing any additions you might make.

Jay, Mentor

Middle School Composition Process | High School Composition Process